WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE TOXIC




What does TOXIC even mean?

 “Toxic: capable of causing serious harm to a person's health and wellbeing. ... Whether exhibited by you personally or by another major figure in your life, these behaviors can rightfully be classed as toxic because of their negative effect on your mental health and wellbeing.” - ConsciousRethink.com

 “A toxic relationship is any relationship that is unfavorable to you or others. The foundations of any relationship, healthy or not, are most commonly established upon mutual admiration and respect, but can, in time, become remarkably unhealthy. ... Toxic relationships can be caused by two polar opposite personality types.” - PsychologyToday.com

 Being toxic is a RESPONSE to a misunderstood life experience. You see, EVERYBODY can be toxic. Being toxic is a CHOICE. And it is usually permitted because of a NEGATIVE PERSPECTIVE to incidences and life.

 Toxicity is HOW YOU BEHAVE WHEN THINGS DO NOT GO THE WAY YOU WANT. It is a response. A person may have challenges in their daily living, but how they handle it will determine if these challenges will be perpetuated or resolved.

 Unfortunately, when your tough life challenges make you become a VICTIM or think like a VICTIM, you are LIKELY to demonstrate toxic patterns.

 For instance, feeling depressed, moody or having self esteem issues IS NOT THE PROBLEM until it becomes a reason why you are UNBEARABLE & ANTI-SOCIAL.

 A typical toxic behaviour constitutes the following results:

 1. You are DRAMATIC. Some people are just DIFFICULT to be with. Everything you say would be used against you. Unreasonable Drama is a toxic behaviour.

 2. Loss of friends. When you find that people consciously avoid or stay away from you, it may be a sign. Not because they don’t love you, but because they’re overwhelmed with your antics and unhealthy pressures. This can also be that you’re (unconsciously) quick to create tension, and make people around you uncomfortable. This is a red flag.

 3. Fair weather friend. If you’re only nice to a person when there is something to get or gain, it is a toxic behaviour. In fact, research shows that Fair Weather Friends are MOST gossips of the friend they are parasitic on.

 4. Superiority Complex. When you put your friends down or make them feel they aren’t doing enough to be in your level or threshold of thinking and owning, it is a toxic behaviour.

 5. Vindictive. You hardly let go. You replay offense at every opportunity especially to rehash the pain and not for inference or resolution. That can be a toxic behaviour.

 6. You’re never at fault. When it is always someone’s fault and never yours. When you hardly apologize, or hardly are convinced you could have done it differently. When you insist on getting even and downplay other people’s apologies, it can be a toxic behaviour.

 I had to expand on this message because yesterday’s post drew a lot of feedback and questions. I hope this helps you and helps someone around you.

 If you can, please attend SOBCA EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE WORKSHOP holding NEXT SATURDAY (20th October) in ABUJA. Get a slot today by calling 0807 361 0884. You will be glad you attended the class.

 Kindly share this post.

 *And let me ask: WHAT IS AN EXAMPLE OF A TOXIC BEHAVIOUR TO YOU? Please tell me.*

 m a k t u b!!!

 Written by Sam Obafemi

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